It Just Isn’t Fair

But then where
was it ever written
that it was supposed to be fair.

And where
was it ever written
that our ideally compatible lover
and our soul-mate
should be incarnate
in the same person.

And even if they were
when was there ever
a guarantee
that we could sustain
the relationship.

Yet the dream persists –
we see ourselves, holding hands,
walking off together
into the sunset.

But that is the movies.
This is real life.

And it just isn’t fair.


23 Responses to “It Just Isn’t Fair”

  1. sold us a dream …. happiness according to how you fit with another. grandma always said there’s worse things in life than being alone.

    • Your grandma was right Eileen.
      I just wanted to illustrate how that sort of thinking just takes us round and round in circles!!!

      Plus I have a fairly nasty chest infection at the moment
      It is being treated.
      But it is these sort of moments when you just want another warm body in the house πŸ™‚


  2. Hi David,

    a good relationship is when you have what you need with the one nearest to you. Dreaming about a would be relationship is one thing, living it can turn out much different though.

    There are more than one soulmate per person, there are more than one relationship that would be a dream. We just have to make the best of what life gives us perhaps. Or act bravely and claim the one we want! πŸ™‚

    Arohanui and I hope you will walk into that sunset with the one and only πŸ™‚ as I know for sure there is that very person for you to be happy with. You deserve it, that is fair!

    xxx and a big get well {{{ hug }}}

    • What a lovely comment Ina,
      Thank you.

      Ah, I am fine really.
      I can sit on my sofa with my iPad and communicate on here which is much more comfortable than sitting at the computer in the other room.

      The poem is really about how when we let things go round and round in our heads they grow bigger but do not get resolved.

      However there is no harm in dreaming. πŸ™‚


  3. I know how life pans out (is “pans” a word in this context or have I made it up?) is all about choices we have made, but nevertheless it can seem unfair. We can look back and wonder why… And what if… And would I have ever had courage… etc, etc, but I guess those are futile wonderings. We are all where we are and it can sometimes feel enough and other times it can feel far from enough.

    Here is some virtual chicken broth sent with loads of love


    • Ah, Christine,

      I don’t normally let myself indulge in what ifs, maybes or not fairs because it doesn’t get me anywhere.

      But sometimes it is comforting to indulge πŸ™‚

      Perhaps I just need a break from these ongoing health niggles (which is another if only! DUH!!)

      That chicken broth is much appreciated. πŸ™‚
      Actually Mrs Baxter has left some in my cupboard!! πŸ™‚

      Loads of love to you too


  4. Yes, I had the perfect relationship once, or did I? Maybe Carl dying 6 months into our relationship wasn’t so good, because he died when things were still in the best possible light, and I never knew his bad points! Does that make sense? It is always nice to have someone to hold/to hold you, though! Loved this! Big hugs David!

    • Ah, Sandy,

      It makes perfect sense.
      I could tell you a story but I won’t because it involves someone else and so it wouldn’t be fair.
      But I can understand exactly what you mean.

      And yes it is always nice to have someone to hold/to hold you. But that in itself is not good enough reason to start a relationship. πŸ™‚

      Big hugs to you too


  5. Fair comment David. You hit the nail on the head there. Hoesnt 7 engaging. Very real. Visit my creative worlds sometimes (:

  6. Good old Mrs Baxter! Just keep taking care of yourself, remember you matter to me and to others, and know that I am here for chats and babble on tap! ❀

    • πŸ™‚

      Mrs Baxter does make exceedingly good soup.
      Her first name is Audrey. Did you know that?
      I visited her factory in Scotland once, but I did not meet her so it seems inappropriate to call her by her first name πŸ™‚

      I do know you are there and it is appreciated.

      Much love

  7. There’s so much I don’t know! And to think I used to know it all! 😊 Xxx

  8. Oh so true David. Good one, my friend.


  9. Great poem David. Strong ending, you reiterate your main point but with a kind of subverted meaning. Chasing the ideal, we can only be disappointed. But we need ideals just to keep us going sometimes.

    • Finding the balance Paul between ideals, dreams and reality is I guess where conflict can arise.
      Without a dream you would never have got to America and I would never have written any poetry.

      But just sometimes I wander into ‘if only’ territory


  10. Ethel and I have been married now for 45, shortly 46, years. I am not sure we are walking off together into the sunset, but I often wonder how I have been so blessed. I believe it is not fair. If I had my way, David, I would gather up the clouds and swirl them around in time until you, and everyone else, has a compatible lover and soulmate. As Robert Frost once said, “Yet knowing how way leads on to way/I doubted if I should ever come back.” Time, the ancient arrow, keeps flying through lives, dispensing fairness and unfairness tied up into moments we hardly realize, leaving us…where? Where we are at this moment?
    I hope you feel better soon, David.

    • What a wonderful comment.
      Thank you Tom – you and Ethel are the proof positive that it is not only in the movies.

      What the movies don’t show and you don’t say is the amount of work required to make it work. the relationships in my life which matter and which are enduring have all required work along the way. But because those relationships matter I have been prepared to put that work in.

      I am content with where I am at this moment πŸ™‚

      My love to both you and Ethel
      Look after yourselves


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